You are my source of anxiety and my source of shelter

I wonder how you can be so cruel at times and—

I wonder why it seems like you despise me

I hear you sigh and shriek at even the thought of me talking

I see you happily ignore me at any chance you get

I want a relationship with you like my friends have with their moms

You are my source of anxiety and my source of shelter

I pretend I don’t need you, but not having you breaks me

I feel like a breaking heart: thump..thump..thump..then, BOOM! I feel every piece of me breaking

Sometimnes we touch on an emotional level, sometimes we don’t

I worry that as I grow older you and I will be in the same state

I worry we will never heal, will never bond, and you will still not care for me as I wish

I cry every night wondering if you like me more of the dog

You are my source of anxiety and me shelter

I understand you work hard to put a roof over my head

Like Thomas Edison worked so hard to bring light to our world

You say you hate me, that you wish you never had me, and that you are not my friend

I dream of the time you will care and ask me how my day was

I dream of the time you will sit down with me and have a conversation with me

And lastly, I dream that you will, one day, lovably latch and lock longingly around me

I hope for you and I to become stronger and closer

As a tornado does when it reaches the ground and storms through the land

You are my source of anxiety and my shelter